Sidequest

Back in the saddle again

2008-01-16T11:49:41Z

I had a really good time. I thought I wouldn't have anything to do and would be staring at my ceiling all day, but we were up and hopping nearly every day that I was there, visiting people (family and Mom's friends) and taking care of less pleasant bank business.

It took a day or two to adjust to hearing English in its many varieties in first Detroit and then Memphis, but the delay between people's questions and my responses steadily decreased. I had a hard time adjusting to the time difference, though. It was my fault for going to sleep way too late on the plane on the way there. I never fully adjusted to the time change, though. I kept waking up at 7pm our time, and reading books or going on cleaning sprees. When we weren't out running errands or visiting people's houses, I was busy reading organizing books and trying to give away old clothes and recycle the pounds of paper we have in the house. I was trying to make up for the years we'd neglected to go through the mountains of clothes we weren't wearing and give them away. I made work for myself, but I enjoyed way more than I'd been enjoying school. It was a challenge that I put a mini-dent into.

I got to visit with my niece, Assata, for a few days, and was amazed by how much she'd grown and how much she knew now. She kept asking me when I'd be going back to Japan. One day, they should get her a calendar and then she'll really be on a roll. She's four and a half going on forty. We had fun together. I was a bossy little thing the whole vacation though, according to notable sources. Must be all the questions I get from the kids at elementary school. The way I phrased requests was completely different than what it had been. I was also more assertive (and, at times, belligerent). Probably been here too long.

I was glad to get back to Japan, though. I felt like I had control of my life once I got back to Osaka. I had no drive at home since I was basically jobless and a bit strapped for cash. I think that's why I threw myself into going through my old clothes and all the boxes of stuff we had in some of the rooms. It gave me a sense of purpose, even if it did exasperate other family members.

School was somewhat laidback last week. I didn't have a cooking lesson, and I think that helped. I've officially tendered my resignation, though. I told Etsuko on Tuesday that I'd be stopping come February. Since Satomi-sensei and I skipped/happily didn't contact Etsuko about a lesson this week or last week, we've got two more lessons to go before we're home free. Looking forward to it. Satomi-sensei is, too. ^_^;; We're trifling young people who aren't good at saying no. I know.

Relaxed fit.

2007-10-20T12:53:24Z

Whew! I had a good time these last two weeks. My first spurt of happiness was the realization that I actually went home smiling at the end of the week two Fridays ago because I didn't have class at Toyohama JHS. I was just there, learning a new taiko piece to play with a few of the students in the Culture Festival next Saturday. I was really excited to have a new project, even if I don't have a lot of time to practice with the kids. I'll be heading over to Toyoshima this Monday, Wednesday and Thursday after school to practice with the taiko group, though. It's the home stretch, and I'm fairly ready. Man, I really love taiko. Drumming is so fun--it really gives me a big rush to rhythmically pound something.

I'll also be working percussion on two other songs the students will be performing--I think they're both Simon and Garfunkel instrumentals. "Sound of Silence" and something with "condor" in the title. And (maybe?) "Scarborough Fair." I'll be wind chiming it up on "Scarborough Fair" and hitting the bongos for for the other two pieces. The rhythm for "Sound of Silence" is decided, but Mrs. Nakagami, the Japanese teacher at Toyohama was still thinking thinking about the "condor" song last Thursday.

R~O~C~K~S

2007-10-02T13:05:46Z

Hanazakari no Kimitachi he was good. Maybe we'll see a special sometime soon. It had one of those, "Oh. There's more." endings. I enjoyed it, rather. I would make a comment about it, but it might spoil it a little. So I'll wait until I know that everyone's watched it all before I say anything.

Mmm...Last weekend's Aki Matsuri (Autumn Festival) was nice. We had less ladies helping to carry the mini-shrine (o-mikoshi) than last year, and you could definitely feel it. However, there was a misty rain drizzling throughout the afternoon as we walked and turned and pushed, so it wasn't as sweaty and hot a job as last year. I heard that we only had sixteen ladies on board this year, compared to the twenty-three we had the year before.

I couldn't believe how quickly I'd gotten used to being a part of island events. This time last year, I was all timid and allowed myself to be led all around the festival once we finished the hauling and went back to eat our free lunch. This year, I was perfectly okay with walking around on my own (though I didn't do much of it--I was quickly snagged by Sanae-san as we waited to for the dance the 3-4 Neighborhood Blocks to begin.) Yes, I did that, too. I even went to dance practice twice with the ladies, at the behest of Sanae-san (she's one of my English Conversation students). She's in her 50s or 60s. I love her. Not so much with most of the other students in the class. What? They come when they want. And that's not very often. It's so...so rude. I hold grudges, even if I can't hold on to the anger for very long.

I figured out what was wrong with me all last week. I was suffering from PMS, and this made my reactions to bullshit very strong. This explains why my eyes flared out at students who refused to try during group sessions in class ("You're telling me that you, a ninth grader, can't translate, 'Do you like flowers?' If you don't understand what's going on, why the hell are you in this class? Just leave."--those were just my irrational thoughts. Hope I didn't scare ya.). This also explains why I didn't find it funny that two of the boys in a different ninth grade class had a heck of a time putting pencils in these humongous pockets that the jacket I wore that day had. I stared at them all stone-faced. they were a little frightened. I made the ringleader mad. He called me a boy. lol (I, of course, responded so maturely and called him a girl. lol At least he used English.)

Damn, I was irrational last week. Up until Monday, I was the biggest cow. This one lady, Etsuko, who's my cooking teacher and local know-it-all, has this grating personality that peppered with niceness that really irks me at times. I know (looking back--hindsight is 20/20, you see) that she says shit to try to be funny. But I don't find it amusing when it's making fun of people's weight or their body type or even their boobs (thankfully, she has yet to wax lyrical about mine). She was out of the line with her lame-ass jokes this week, but everything about her grated my nerves, so I know that at lot of my anger at her stemmed from my high level of irrationality. But she can still be a big cow. She didn't say anything too hurtful at today's lesson. Just insulted my decorative squirting of mayonnaise as commanded. And she demanded that I apologize to Satomi-san, the nursery school teacher who takes lessons with me (thank the Lord for her and her ability of keep up conversation at the dinner table). If Etsuko-san had asked me to tell Satomi about the change in schedule, I would have. However, she didn't, and I didn't think about it. So we had the lesson today instead of tomorrow. Oh, well. No one was hurt.

But other than that, she was on good behavior. I think she noticed that I was in a foul mood last week. Good. Keeps her on her toes.

Ahh, shoot. I'll write again another day. I'm going to visit my host family for the first time in about two months this weekend. I wonder how they've changed...

More boo-hoo's from the peanut gallery of one.

2007-10-02T12:47:04Z

This is actually from yesterday night (October 1), but it's just now being posted. My apologies. Mumble-mumble.

Mellow greetings, everyone. I fell off the face of the earth for a while, but I've since climbed back up the cliff. My heart is still beating properly, but I don't know about any other part of me. I was kind of procrastinating waiting until I had formed a solid opinion about my new (but not necessarily better) school schedule. I've since realized that I won't be able to decide how I really feel about this schedule for quite a while. We're talking probably until the end of December, man.

I have good days and bad days, leading to not-so-bad weeks and gawd-my-head-hurts weeks. I don't really think I'm sufficiently prepared for this kind of work schedule (so not good at planning ahead--but I'm learning. Boy, am I). I've gotta do what I can, though. I don't want to give up this year and not think I didn't do my best. I don't want disappoint Uekiyo-sensei, either. (He's a great guy, and a great teacher. I have wanted him to be my JTE since forever. I'm not so gung-ho about throwing myself into work anymore, though. Don't want to spread myself too thin. I feel like I'm a not-so thick layer of cream cheese on a Ritz cracker already.)

But on the other hand, I don't want to stress overmuch about planning and planning and planning for activities. Not so good at focusing all the time on one thing. It's not so much actually working out the activities when I'm given some kind of direction ("Let's practice asking for help..." Blah, blah. Something like that.) It's the times where I'm given free reign that most frighten me. I hate not having some kind of area to start in. I can fill in the picture when there are a few lines drawn, but I'm no good with a blank canvas. I mean, is there something you want the kids to practice? Do they need review for a certain grammar structure? Do they need to practice certain phrases? What? Those times are the ones where I'm the most anxious.

When Uekiyo-sensei (at my "new" school) first told me that I'd have to make up activities for the 3年生 every Friday, to be honest, the very thought of all that pressure and responsibility literally sickened me. Just recalling it makes my stomach recoil. I've since calmed down a bit, but I still suffer from minor anxiety attacks. I don't even show my emotions on the outside: it's my innards that take the brunt of the abuse because I rarely formulate my thoughts well enough to express what about the situation makes me want to retch. See? I can't even do it properly now.

I'm still a little overwhelmed by all this responsibility I have at Toyohama JHS. I had so much daydreaming time at Yutaka that it's not even funny. My teacher there never thinks ahead unless someone's coming to watch the class. And that's not very often. Maybe thrice in a school year. Oh. There are once-a-months days where teachers have an "open class" at Yutaka, but those never seemed to fall on days that I was visiting last year, so I never heard about them until a few months ago. My teacher at Yutaka is the worst when it comes to thinking ahead. And now that I'm only at Yutaka regularly just once a week (Wednesdays), she always pulls her "I've got the first class covered. Can you think of some kind of game for the other two classes?" stunt. What the hell? You know that I come on Wednesdays. Why don't you look ahead in the book you've been teaching out of for ten or fifteen years, and suggest an activity, you goof?

But isn't that the pot calling the kettle black. I can tell that Mrs. Sakimori is trying this semester (she's finally implemented a point/reward system--an incarnation of an idea I suggested a year ago, but which she probably heard again somewhere at a conference). Even still, I don't feel inclined to help her unless she asks for assistance. (There goes my beat-up, tilted halo. ^_^;;) I got shot down too many times already for stuff I wanted to do when I was fresh and new, but now I'm used to the rare occasional fake team teaching done for the big wigs. I don't try so hard to work with her any more, or suggest ideas. But thanks to Uekiyo-sensei, I can probably do like he said and use the ideas/worksheets we do at Toyohama at Yutaka. But since Mrs. Sakimori never knows where the hell they'll be in the book this time next week, it's usually too late to even suggest something. I need to (and I'm going to, if I keep up the guts) tell her that I need some advance notice if she wants something really useful for the kids. Give me a week's notice, not two hours'. Phooey.

Dang. It's only nine o'clock (...and now it's closer to ten), but I'm sooo sleepy. Must be because of the tough time I had falling asleep last night, and the crap-happy early start to my Monday. I'm not good at having my mind and body fall straight to sleep when I want it to. And if I've got something on my mind, I will even drown out the music playing from my computer. Regardless, I should hit the sack earlier than usual for a Monday night. I should be a good girl and protect my fragile, human body.

I have lots more complaining to do (about competing with Vanessa's "ghost" at Toyohama, about being targeted for verbal abuse by a [probably] self-proclaimed "do-gooder" who doubles as my cooking teacher, about the Autumn Festival last Saturday...the list goes on and on), but I'll leave it here. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I want to work on this assignment for class on Friday before I go to bed tonight. o.O I know, Lilly. I know. I said that I don't want to have to do work at home. I don't want to. I don't like it. But there's not enough free time in the freaking day for me. Shame on the daylight!

I'd better start up a schedule where I "do work" for a couple of hours on certain nights of the week, and chill the freak out those nights I have places to be. See? This is why I don't want to go back to school once I return to American Life. I'm not even getting graded on this stuff, and I want it to be "right". There's that whole disappointment factor, too. But I can only work so hard at home. I'm sure as hell not going to lose sleep over not finishing something before bedtime, though. I draw the line at that. I guess that makes me like Zoro, who manages to catch a wink whenever he can.

Scratchy throat, upset stomach.

2007-09-08T02:17:09Z

Ugh. My first week of the second semester of school is finally over. I thought it would never come. Let me give you a run-down of my schedule and how it went. Well, first, how about a little background? Yes, all right.

From last September and up to this July, I was a two-school woman. The nearby island where my friend and fellow JET Vanessa lived had a similar arrangement.I had three days of my island JHS, and two days of elementary school. It was a sweet setup. However, the advent of the 2007-2008 re-contracting year for JETs in the Kure area brought some changes. The Kure BOE decided (probably as early as this time last year) that they would not be hiring anyone to replace the JET who left one of the far out island--meaning me or Vanessa. The remaining JET would cover all four schools (two JHS and two elementary schools) in the area. My supervisor Mr. Sakata mentioned this plan to me in January or February of this year--just around the time that we would be turning in our Re-Contracting Forms.

Upon hearing this, I remember saying that whoever had to do that (take over the neighboring JET's schools) would definitely need a vehicle to get back and forth. There is one bus per hour that goes either way between my island and the neighboring Toyoshima island. It's ridiculous to expect a person who's commuting back and forth two to three times a week to rely on an once-an-hour bus. If that bus is missed, I'd either have to wait another hour for the next one (and be even later to school) or find alternate transportation (ie. hitch a ride) to the other island. When the request for leave to acquire a vehicle was shot down at that Jan-Feb one-on-one interview, I remember sarcastically responding, "What? You expect me to ride the bus back and forth to school?" But that's exactly what Mr. Sakata and his BOE supervisors expect. Too bad the Japanese don't much understand sarcasm. So, I am opposing this suggestion (or order, or whatever you want to call it) and looking for a vehicle to get me between both places.

Since that meeting with my supervisor at the beginning of the year, I have mentioned my searching for/intent to search for a vehicle twice in person: once in June, then again in early August. The first time I mentioned it to him in June, Mr. Sakata's face broke--broke as in he dropped his "pleasant" mask and mean-mugged me. This did express his displeasure well. The second time I mentioned the car thing in August, he kept his composure and only said, "Please let me know when you get a car, and I'll notify my supervisors." Which seemed like a big turnaround from his Demon Spawn look and attitude from before.

A couple of teachers have actually called to the BOE about helping me look for a vehicle and be succinctly told that the BOE does not want me to have a car. One of those people was the vice principal at Vanessa's school (Toyohama JHS). I asked him about helping me some three or four months ago. I asked him to keep an ear out for a decently priced rental or used car, but up until yesterday, I hadn't heard much about it from him. He has called the BOE at least twice about the car situation (I guess to ask "permission"?), and been told the same the each time, probably--that it was "dame" and that they're not condoning me purchasing a vehicle. When he told me yesterday (Friday) afternoon after lunch, I was really pissed. Well, before that he said that whatever place he'd called about a rental car would take not less than 200,000 ($175-ish) a month. Over the course of a year that would be...$2100, give or take a few tens or twenties. WTF? Might as well get a piece of car for that much.

So, anyway. Mr. Takemae said that rental shit, and then that the BOE still says car purchasing wasn't allowed. Which isn't want the contract I signed last year (and the one I just signed last month) say. They said it's perfectly all right for JET to use his or her vehicle to commute to and from school--which is just what I'll be using it for. Really makes me want to slur the character of people associated with posturing and being jerks at the BOE. But there's no use trying to appeal to them to see sense. I really didn't want to go against the "will" of the BOE with this car thing, and I was waiting for them to see the light about how necessary it was for someone commuting twenty minutes by bus every day to have her own mode of transportation, but that'll never happen. I'll just have to do what I need to and get what I need myself. But I'm too ineffective to work this out alone.

I know that the fact that I don't have a car right now is my own fault. I'm not assertive enough/confident enough to go onto car lots and look for what I want. I just thought that someone would be able to help me. But since the BOE is against a car in the first place, I can't ask anyone at work (at none of the four schools) to help me out. One teacher at my original elementary school said that I should enlist the aid of my helper lady, Umesako-san, at the town hall to look for a piece of car that's somewhere close-by on the island. This as opposed to me looking for one on the mainland and having to ferry it back. My cooking teacher, Etsuko, also said that she would look around for a vehicle for me, and that would be great if it worked out. Time will tell.

As it is, I don't think I'll ever get enough sleep for worrying about missing the damn bus in the morning and ruining one of my many school schedules. I have a feeling that I'll have a breakdown about this running back and forth between schools thing sometime soon, either emotionally or physically. I already made myself a little sick this week (the first week, at that!) with getting up at 5:30 and worrying that I'd miss the 6:00 bus to Toyoshima, or forgetting something that i needed for school. If I hadn't been taking vitamins and protein and stuff that I've gotten from my mom and host mom, I think I would have fallen gotten sicker even faster.

By the time Thursday night and my English conversation class rolled around, I was in a really snappy mood. It didn't help that two students who hadn't showed up in ten months and three months, respectively, decided to come to class. One was already a horrible student, and the other wasn't that much better in the first place when she was coming regularly. I guess that why I got really pissed when the below-mediocre student couldn't grasp what I meant when I said, "How was Shizuoka?" or wherever it was that she said she'd gone on vacation. It really angered me.

The actual class wasn't any better. Last week, I'd promised a dialogue arranging exercise for my one diligent student, Sanae-san. I guess she had such a good time in our class last week that she decided to call the delinquent students. I actually wasn't happy to see them. I knew that it would be harder with people who hadn't been coming to class lately, and didn't appear interested in learning English in the first place. (When people spend more time looking at the ceiling or checking the condition of their hands than trying to participate in the activity in front of them, I think that indicates disinterest in the activity at hand.) It shortened my temper significantly, and I kept sneaking furtive glances at my watch in hopes that time was still flowing. I didn't even realize that I was overly stressed until people started mentioning that I looked tired. Then I felt it myself. I just thought I was in a bad mood. Even though I got to sleep in a bit more (till 6:15 or 6:30, I think) thanks to the ride to Toyohama JHS that I got from Sanae-san's son, it still wasn't enough. I was told that I looked tired by a couple of ladies in the office, and I think even Uekiyo-sensei noticed. I'm not sure, though. He said that he would make sure the our classes were arranged after second period so that I would have time to take the late bus (7:45 from my stop, and arrive at school at 8:20). I'll be grateful for those days I can sleep in until seven, that's for sure.

Before I forget, here's my basic schedule for this school year:

Monday - Yutaka JHS/Toyohama JHS (alternates weekly)
Tuesday - Yutaka ES
Wednesday - Yutaka JHS
Thursday - Toyoshima ES
Friday - Toyohama JHS

There's more work on my plate because I'm effectively doing the work to two ALTs. This schedule might be the most effective way for me to be at all of the schools in one week and still be able to plan for the next day of classes at that school. If I only went to one JHS per week, I'd never know where the other school would be when I next came to visit. In theory. I've got to do something about my sleeping schedule (11:30 is too late for most of these days now) so that I can wake up properly and be effective at school. But I also need to make sure I get my assignments for school finished. And I need to eat properly (doing okay so far). And I need to evaluate my evening commitments (cooking lesson, taiko, English conversation class). I know I don't want to take on anymore activities in the evening. I've got to have chill out time during the week. (Right now I've got Mondays and Fridays and every other Wednesday to myself.) We'll see how these first few weeks go. Even though I've mellowed out a lot when it comes to helping the kids since I first came to Japan, I think I try too hard sometimes.

Sorry about that. This post turned into a cathartic writing exercise instead of an update. I'll try again when I'm more cheerful.

My fate (as opposed to Conrad's Fate).

2007-08-23T01:47:04Z

You know, I didn't really know what I was going to write about when I opened this "Post an Entry" page, but I think a brainstorm is coming.

Got to see a recorded version of Wicked last night. I stayed up until one watching it, and was late for school this morning. ^_^; That's quite all right, though. It's still summertime. I always seem to end up late at least twice during these long vacations where we go to school anyway.

Last week I was in Hiroshima for the prefectural orientation and then in Kure for a our city-ish orientation at the BOE. No one was really there, having taken off using nenkyuu (yearly leave). That made it easier and quicker--at least on Friday, where Mr. Sakata spoke to us each personally about our spots and how to get there. It's really weird taking over Vanessa's school's, but not so scary as it would be to be brand new walking into the place blind. I know Uekiyo-sensei a bit from the times I came to visit Vanessa at school. I think he's had time to get used to me a little already, since he's met me before. I made him laugh the other day (by something he remembered me saying several months ago), so I think it's progress. I know I like him way more than my other teacher, Mrs. Sakimori. lol He way more willing to listen to a JET's ideas and try to implement them. I hope we get to have a good time with the kids together.

Vanessa told me so much about the bitchy secretaries at both schools. I totally understand where she's coming from. Right now, I can laugh at their audacity (the whole "coffee incident" and the gossiping they love, as Vanessa told me). We'll see how I react when it's eventually directed at me.

Mmm...Last week, I got to go to karaoke three whole times(!!) in the space of four days. It was a little much, even for me. Must be getting old. ^^ I went on Thursday on my own and Saturday on my own, and then on Sunday with my host mom, sister Sayuri, and my host mom's fried Mrs. Kunimasa and her daughter Youko. I feel like I burned a lot of calories. And I always feel good when people seem to enjoy me singing songs. It's warms me right up. And people always seem to say the same thing...that they could "feel" my emotions in the songs. I always thought it was more that a non-Japanese person was singing Japanese songs. But I sing the songs I sing because they appeal to me and make me feel something--a shiver or a energetic feeling, or something. It's different each time. So maybe it's not just a fluke when people compliment me. I'm happy to sing for anyone who wants to hear yet another love song in Japanese, though. ^^ But only in the karaoke box. Not out on the street. That's completely different.

I'll definitely miss the karaoke boxes in Japan. Really makes me want to start my own karaoke business up in the States (or wherever I eventually live). It'll take a crap load of money and wrangling rights and all kind of stuff, surely. And why hasn't anyone already capitalized on this idea? If there was a karaoke box place in the US somewhere, I couldn't help but want to visit it at least once. Somebody, get on the ball, please!

Oops. Looks like this entry didn't have as much meaning as I thought. lol Oh! I know. I'll tell one of my future goals. I'm going to take this online Continuing Education class from a university in my hometown this October. It's an editing class, which is designed to be helpful for both writers and editors. I hope it sparks my interest in further learning, and I'll figure out what direction I want to go in from there. I don't want to go back to school just yet, but I don't mind learning something interesting and hopefully worthwhile.

I'm also in the planning stages on working out when I'll be going home to visit for a couple of weeks in Christmas. I want to visit Alicia in Reno for a couple of days at least during that time. I distinctly remember promising her that I would come to visit when I spoke to her for like two hours sometime in March. I even remember her (half-joking?) idea that we could pool our expertise and go into business together when we talked online a while back: Alicia with her advertising and graphic design background, and me with my professional/technical writing and editing semi-background. ^^ I've been thinking about it on and off since she mentioned it, and it's been several months since we last talked-talked. I'm thinking about it, though. I wonder if she still remembers that conversation.

And I'm kinda "Boo!!" to higher education at the moment. I don't want to have to write and present a thesis. I think I hate research. That's all thanks to McNair and Dr. Trites, I think. What a bitch of a time I had. Probably no worse than other people. Not fair that some people in the program just got by with a crap-ass essay, and then some of us had to suffer through data collection and contemplating punching holes through walls. Bah. Anyway, yes. Grad school. The idea of learning sounds nice, but not the idea of putting together a paper I'll never want to see or use ever again for the sake of being recognized as a graduate. But, hey. Maybe Carnegie Mellon doesn't make you do stuff like that if you don't want to. Hmm...Let me check. No, they just have you do an internship and complete 12 courses. Nothing about ::shiver:: big research, or...a thesis defense (::runs screaming out of the office::). Maybe Carnegie Mellon will be okay. Maybe I should think about applying finally. Mmm...Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. It's a big city. But it would only be for two years at the most, I guess. Unless I liked it up there in the cold. I just assume it's cold up there. I wonder...

Quitting sometimes solves something.

2007-07-17T14:48:42Z

Greetings, fellow readers! It is I, Sleepy Janitha, posting something random as usual. It's straight up eleven in the evening on Tuesday night here, and I just finished up my cooking lesson and subsequent conversation with my neighbor Etsuko Kaneko about an hour and a half ago. Before my lesson, however, I was gifted with a initially puzzling and then a faint yada (don't wanna~!), "gag-me" feeling. Let me elaborate.

So this afternoon, I got an email on my phone from this young man whom I used to work with on subbing Detective Conan (I was an editor). Around the end of May, he announced that he was quitting the fansubbing community for the pursuit of something else that might interest him more. I thought that this was perfect for me, because I was steadily feeling pressure to crank out an episode that I wasn't that interested in editing. For example, I'd take longer and longer (two or three weeks at most) to send back a script that might take all of three hours to work the main kinks out of. If that's not a sign that I wasn't "feeling" the whole editing gig much anymore, i don't know what is.

Anyway, at the time, I gave him my diplomatic fairwells and wished him luck in real life and all that. I said nothing about wanting to pick up where we left off because the group was basically finished. If I had wanted to keep editing stuff, I would have joined up with another Conan group, say, DCTP, the Detective Conan Translation Project. I've enjoyed my free time since the beginning of June when I turned in my last script. I like coming home and staring off into space if I want to. In the end, I was so disinclined to to work on editing scripts (that required more time than usual to get through because of issues with the translator/translation) that I would only really get to work when my supervisor boss guy asked, "How's 156 coming?" And working under DCTP was more nerve-wracking than ever working for this other group. They were crazy and wanted edits of scripts within a couple of days of them being sent to me.

Well, that was actually for a special project where there was a new, plot-driven episode aired every week (in place of a one-time, two-hour special like they usually do), but I didn't enjoy the four weeks of feeling overworked when I got home from school, which usually landed on my English conversation class day, which is a busy ass night already for me. Nope, didn't enjoy it at all. Even on a good, leisurely day of editing, I like to watch a show at least twice after the first actual editing session. There's always something you don't catch the first, second, even third time. So I'm a perfectionist in a way. So sue me. In general, I don't like to have my name attached to crap.

Um...where was I? Oh, yes. Today. So, when I got an email about "Conan news" from an excited Supervisor Boss Guy, I actually thought that it had something to do with the actual series. I hadn't heard from the guy in several weeks, save for random spam-like messages stating unwarranted information about his cable bill and other things I've since blocked from my mind/deleted from my message history. So I fell for the bait and asked, "What Conan news?" Foolish move, J. He eventually goes on to say that the group has decided to do episodes "205+" and that he's sent several scripts to my gmail account already.

Dang. I didn't know that there was still a group. I thought it was over. I thought I didn't have to worry about starting to dislike editing fansubs anymore. But when I read that email, I didn't feel excitement over the thrill of a challenge (that is, making sense of possibly disjointed translations). I just felt tired. You know how your lips move a bit to the side in a kind of "hmph" expression when you don't really like what you're hearing? Well, that's about all the emotion I could muster.

After being spammed with two or three more messages asking me why I wasn't answering (maybe because the I was away from my phone doing work for once?), I got ready to leave for home and told him that I'd respond with my answer after I got back from my night class. I had Vanessa help me pen a terse (for me, at least) email back to my boss guy and tell him my thoughts about working on a seemingly infinite project. I know that I was able to get through the ones I did while I was over here in Japan because I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. But to sign on to more of the same stuff without a goal in sight is beyond me right now. I've gotten used to having other things occupy my time other than subbing Conan. Not to say that I dislike the show or anything. I just don't want to work behind the scenes right now anymore.

Blah. So, anyway, I basically said that I'd thought that he'd retired and that he'd gotten over his burnout quicker than I had. I told him that I wanted to stop fansubbing while I still liked it, not when I detested it. I also said that I'd feel pressured if I signed on to do more than one episode. Then I said that I was sorry I couldn't help, but I just didn't want to do it. Then I wished him well. That succinct reply was all thanks to Vanessa. She helped me keep it short, and not ramble on, trying to explain my actions. (I continued to do the same with her on the phone as she said, "I know. I know." Thanks, Vanessa!)

Mmm... That's been about an hour ago. I feel bad for turning someone down (not that I was officially asked if I was on board until my boss guy was somewhat affected by my not answering his summons immediately). But I know that I'd feel worse for getting involved in editing again and not being completely gung-ho about it. I think that someone else who's still passionate about the editing job should take it over. I hope he's able to find someone good to work on it. I won't complain to anyone if I don't like the edits, though. I'm not such a Conan editing snob that I can't watch episodes that I haven't edited myself. However, if it were some kind of movie (say, the Lovely Complex movie that I recently watched with Vanessa two Saturdays ago), I wouldn't have a problem with fixing that up. And, you know, that's what I did. I was finished with it in about a hour and a half, tops. The grammar was already pretty good. Some lines were just kinda awkward. But I fixed it. For my benefit and for Vanessa's.

Shoot, this got really long. I'm totally going to bed now. It's like ten till midnight. I'll continue my complaining later. Later.

G'night, all!!!

A car, a book, a sleepy face

2007-07-04T11:46:37Z

I don't really have anything to say. I have had the opportunity to read some fine, fine literature in the last three days, and I just felt I had to share it with the world. Maria V. Snyder--author of Poison Study, and its sequel, Magic Study--is indeed awesome in my eyes. I was screaming in frustration with the main character many a time and wow-ing at the crazy action scenes that appeared throughout the two books. Man, oh, man. Good times. I don't think I've been this touched by a book in a while. I really enjoy this giddy feeling of wondering when I'll have an opportunity to read more of the story next. I forget when I last felt like this...must have been a few months ago.

Anyway, I don't really want to give away anything plot-wise, but Poison Study begins with the main character, Yelena, being granted an opportunity to escape public execution by becoming the food taster for her country's leader. Not being a fool, she accepts the offer...and the story takes off from there. She moves out of her prison cell in the dungeon and up in the castle world. She begins an intricate study of poisons and taste-testing, and...and all kinds of stuff. And while I admit to reading this first as an ebook, I've already got both books awaiting purchase in my Amazon.com shopping cart of dreams. They were just that good. And that's where I saw the awesome covers available for the hardback and paperback versions. Check it out:

Anyway, the story is really good, and I really dig it. Too bad the third installment comes out in March 2008, far, far away from Now. Oh, well. I'll find something else to occupy my time, surely.

Speaking of time, my idyllic life with just one JHS and one Elementary school is winding down. Come September, I'll be a four-school ALT. Which I'm sure is still not as crazy as other ALTs in my city. I really got used to this nice life on the island, where I knew where I was supposed to be every day of the week. I'll be everywhere come this time next month, probably. Ugh. I'm not looking forward to it. I wouldn't mind so much if I already had wheels. But, alas, I don't. Won't have enough money to buy anything for a while, either. But at least my $6,500 credit card is paid off!!! Hahahahaha.

Now, I just have the loan to pay back (a good chuck of which McNair was darling enough to pay on one semester when they granted me some money at school and I already had everything covered). So, now I have about...(checks the National Student Loan Data System)...$3,310 to pay back to Uncle Sam. It used to be about the same amount as my credit card, but Mom has been paying it off for me every month with the money I send back, one $100 check at a time. The loan's interest doesn't even come close to the horrible bitch my First Financial Bank credit card was. Now it's been balance-transferred to the 0% interest rate until 2008 [for balance transferred credit] Bank of America card.

It was my goal to get the loan cleared off my record by December of this year, but I've since abandoned that idea. It would be another strain on my finances, at least now. It was getting old sending ¥200,000 (about $1,700-$1,800) of my paycheck home every month to pay for the credit card bill and incidentals at home in the US. I'm going to make some kind of payment plan and see how much I need to send back to whittle it down fairly quickly. I just know that I want to pay more than $100 a month on it from now on, since I've got the credit card out of the way. I know that this wasn't a lot of money to build up in the scheme of things (I mean, there's still the questionable prospect of grad school in my future), but I feel very much relieved to have one burden off my back. I'm eternally grateful for my acceptance in JET and my placement on my island, which helped cut down on things that I could spend my money on.

Speaking of credit, I know I've mentioned it nearly a year a go (like three or four entries back, probably ^^;;), but I really do recommend the Financial Peace Planner by Dave Ramsey to anyone who has credit cards to pay, bills to pay, and life to live. That green paperback book made me a "Debt Snowball" Nazi for a while. I'm still harping on my mom to do the same for our family and start tossing those credit cards, but it's not that easy when one daughter is still in school (working on her doctorate, no less) and that daughter is a single parent. And there was a time where we were without insurance for a good nine or ten months, just around the time I needed to be preparing for JET after being shortlisted. So, yes, I can understand one's reluctance to give up a safety net. But that safety net has to be cleared of some of the financial debris that's been on there for years and years, and is steadily increasing. Another of my plans after paying off my credit card was to help my Mom and Dad whittle down some of their bills. I hope I'll still be able to do that. We'll see. I could even set aside a bit of change once a month (like I should be for saving up for a vehicle), and set it towards my family's credit card debt. But nothing will change if the cards are still being used. So I'll have to target one that's not being used and just being paid on. Yes.

Well, what do you know? I did have something to say, albeit something ramblingly preachy. That's all for now, folks. I've written on this off and on all day. I hope those pictures show up. And Happy Fourth of July to all! Yaay. ::yawn::

Back from the Blue Lagoon.

2007-06-20T02:10:56Z

Yeah, wow. It's been a whopping 49 weeks since I've posted on LJ. That's very, very close to a year. Sorry about that. Not that I've posted on blurty for the last six months either. >_< But in this case, no news means good news. My internet here on my island took about five or six minutes to load up blurty when I wanted to write up something, and I eventually lost patience with it. So I just read other people's entries, and wait the requisite three minutes for the comments page to load when I wish to make a comment.

But, anyway. I think I'll post some pictures up. I've really changed physically (and probably mentally and emotionally) over the last eleven (!!) months. I gained some weight in the seven months after I graduated and did nothing but sit around and surf the internet, and I didn't even notice. But wow. My face sure looked squishy in the pictures I took at events last summer. I only really began to notice after the first few months when my head seemed smaller in pictures. ^^; Huh.

One thing I hate about Japan is everyone's obsession with weight. I wasn't purposely trying very hard, but thanks to all my bike riding to and from school for fifteen minutes each way for three days (junior high) and eight minutes or so each way for the other two (elementary) and eating something green with my meals most of the time and taking the protein and prune extract my host mother wished me to take when I begin my day each morning, I've toned up a little. And I've learned that no matter what you do here (or no matter how much you flare your eyes at people), they love to mention dieting. That's how I know I'll never be able to live here for more than a few years. Because it's not about being healthy here. It's about being skinny/sickly. Even if I weigh the same amount that I weighed when I got here (which I don't), the fact that a lot of that has been turned into muscle accounts for nothing to these people. They can't see anything but a person's width, and that's how they judge whether someone's healthy or not. It's mind boggling.

Obviously, they've never seen that American commercial series that had "great" looking people suddenly collapse because they had high blood pressure or weren't taking in enough calories or some other crap. It's like no one's satisified here until your waist is twenty-five inches all around--and that's on the "big" side to them. o_O

Well, not everyone is like that. I cherish the people that I've met this year and become friends with who don't feel like it's necessary to mention shit like my weight every time we meet. For people who get insulted if you don't finish everything on your plate or (gasp) have an allergy to something, they sure are bitchy about people enjoying a meal. But people are stupid everywhere. This I have learned quite well over this past year.

Okay, that's enough of my sudden tirade. If I had before and after pictures of My Dramatic Changes™, I'd post them. Oh, yeah. I do. I need to get a photo account started at PicasaWeb.

The List

2006-07-04T03:01:15Z

My gosh, it's been nearly three months since my first, lonely post. I continue to wait for deliverance about my housing and school schedule for my designated city, Kure-shi, Hiroshima-ken. But what to do... I know! I'll post one of my packing lists up for perusal. Most of the initial items are my personal things to pack, but towards the bottom of the list I just copy-pasted from various posts on JET sites and BigDaikon forum posts.

Toiletries

Couple of rolls of toilet paper to tide you over
Toothpaste
Face wash
Makeup
Lotion
Tampons/pads
Stomach medicine
Lots of cold medicine
Robitussin
Pepto-Bismol
Nasal spray (for post-nasal drip)
Melatonin - helpful for getting a good night's sleep
Sunscreen
Towel to dry with the first week or so
Thermometer
Shampoo/Conditioner
OFF! Skintastic (2)
Wet Ones/Hand sanitizer

Clothing

Slippers (2-3 pairs)
Birkenstocks
Long johns
Dress shoes
Flats
Boots
Hiking boots
Raincoat(s)
Collapsible umbrella for backpack
Wool socks

Food

Favorite boxed foods
Granola bars
Favorite cookies
Cereal

Miscellaneous

Voltage adaptor
Electric blanket (?)
Coin purse
Collapsible umbrella for backpack
Electronic dictionary
Stickers and rubber stamps
Board games
UNO
Videogames and PS2
Books, books, books
Music
Passport-size photos—-just in case
George Foreman grill
BlueTac/Sticky Tac

School Stuff: Random snippets of otherworldly advice

Wall map of your country
Photographs or postcards of your home country, country’s capital city, famous landmarks
Picture book of country’s famous landmarks/landscape
Picture book or photos of your country’s food
One outfit of your country’s national dress
Photos of your house, kitchen, refrigerator (opened and closed), bedroom (show that we don’t use futons!), front and back yards
[If possible, a video tape of all this is good…the Japanese VCRs are same as American]
One CD with children’s songs on it (hokey pokey, head shoulders knees toes, etc)
One book of nursery rhymes, preferably with big letters and pictures kids can color
Stickers with English words on them (well done, good job!)
Board games like Clue or Risk are always fun
Holiday stuff: Halloween masks/costumes, Christmas cards for the kids to send, Menorah (if Jewish), and other religious stuff

If American:

High school yearbook
Photos of anything to do with school (regular clothes not uniforms, yellow school buses, lunch room/cafeteria, classrooms, kids driving cars to school, etc.)
4th of July decorations
Thanksgiving decorations/dinner photos
Something showing the U.S. presidents, government
After school jobs (photos of students working at McDs, the mall, etc)
Photos of cars (the size of them) and the roads (most roads are one lane each side, and the cars are tiny here)

Um, yeah. I don't really want to spend out all this money for omiyage and class items and such. I'm still jobless at the moment. Can't really keep draining my savings account for much longer. I'll be taking out a cash advance from my credit card company shortly before I leave. At least that'll be on my August bill instead of the July bill. I'm even waiting to pay for an eBay item or two with credit until after July 7 when my billing cycle ends. Though I'm nowhere near as in debt as I could be, it's still painful to think about all that's been charged and will be charged on this account...I can only hope that the first check will be worth it. I've got to pay this stuff off. And pay my loans, and help my mom with funds, and be a respectable citizen...Maybe that last one can wait. I've got a little time yet.

As I was formatting the lists above, I thought about the Rocky Horror Picture Show and how I was in awe the first year I saw it in Murray, yet the following year (when I better understood the inner workings of university), I was like, "This sucks. It's not freeing or exhilirating. It's just an excuse to dress terribly and cross-dress badly and wear fishnets." I was disillusioned with the Rocky Horror Picture Show and couldn't really understand why it had such a big following. It wasn't as if it were, say, Detective Conan for goodness' sake. But I have since learned. There are fans, and then there are F.A.N.S. (I'll make up words for that acronym later). I'm proud to be a lowercase fan of many different things.

Hajimemashite

2006-04-14T05:11:23Z

I'm actually taking this name so that I can have it on the off-chance I decide to post info both here and on my blurty page. Maybe I'll use it as my spurious connection to the livejournal world once I'm officially a part of the JET Program. Who knows, who knows?

Ja!